“Intercourse” House Party (Part 2) May 9, 2010Posted by FCM in authors picks, books!, entertainment, health, international, PIV, pop culture, rape, sorry!, thats mean, trans, WTF?.
Tags: dworkin, intercourse, male privilege, PIV, pregnancy
part one is here. as i explained before, i am attempting to lay some groundwork, as it were, to any future discussion of dworkin’s ”intercourse.” many people report being unable to understand her, but thats really no excuse, is it, for a failure to dissect and discuss PIV, and its implications for women, as a sexual class, around the world?
if feminists arent doing this work, its not going to get done. so, mindful of that, i offer part 2. and…bear with me, because its really a downer!
intercourse can literally kill you, if you are a woman. (sorry! really, i am). it causes pregnancy, which is a medical event that can last for years (including lactation, and assuming that there were no long-term complications, which there often are). PIV is the one and only cause of obstetric fistula, gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, miscarriage and abortion, and is causative of the illnesses and deaths of hundreds of thousands of women annually (see maternal morbidity and mortality here, and a discussion of “near misses” here).
and the list of risks of being on the pill are as long as my arm, and include the risk of death by blood clot. and women are more susceptible to STD infections than men are due to biological differences…specifically that we have vaginas that men ejaculate into, and their bacteria and viruses cant be washed away. and trying to wash them away by douching actually makes it WORSE, because you irritate your tissues and interrupt the normal cleansing process of the vaginal environment. (i know, its TRANSPHOBIC!!! to talk about womens vaginas, and the consequences to women to having them. oh well, get over it. because its true.)
and PIV is known to destroy womens careers, and their livelihoods, as well. not even considering the “mommy track” that so many women allegedly “choose,” even if you have an early abortion, you are risking getting in trouble at work if you are too sick to come in, in the first weeks and months of pregnancy due to morning sickness. i mean really. sitting under your desk puking into a fucking trashcan doesnt look so good, because most people assume you are drunk (although appearing unintentionally knocked up doesnt do a woman any favors, either, in the “i am responsible, just like a man!!!11!!” competition). and if you are too sick to even drive or take public transportation, you cant even clock in, to humiliate yourself this way. or to get paid, obvs.
yes, thats right…there are severe consequences to women, but not to men, of engaging in PIV. and i am not about to blame women for continuing to do it, and i am not going to ask (at least not today) why women are having PIV with men. what i would like to know, however, is why MEN are continuing to do it, when they know how dangerous it is, for women. this is not a rhetorical question.
again, since most readers here are women, this can be approached as a thought exercise. imagine, if you will, that there were no consequences to *you* of having PIV. but that all the consequences i mentioned above, actually applied to *men* and not to you. imagine that fucking your husband, or bf, or anyone with a dick really, could literally kill them, or make them very ill. imagine that they were taking on all the risk, and you werent risking a thing.
would you still do it? would you ride your mate into the sunset, bucking wildly on his dick and screaming when you were about to come? (pornified version). would you tenderly “make love” to him, knowing how potentially fucking screwed he could be, in the weeks and months to come, by virtue of the act you were about to perform on his person i mean with him, lovingly? (its an “act of love” version).
and in this topsy-turvy world i have created here, where there are consequences of PIV to men but not to women…would you ever pressure him into it? or expect it? or demand it? or “take” it? (the rape version). what if he wanted it, and claimed to enjoy it? what if he really, truly did enjoy it? would that change anything, for you? would his “consent” be problematic, in your mind, at all? or would it be a free pass to place him in harms way?
now…what if you knew for a fact that there was very little chance that he was even going to enjoy it? would that matter to you, at all? what if it were common knowledge that most men didnt really like PIV anyway, or at least it wasnt their preferred sexual act, and that their bodies werent really built to orgasm this way? what if the numerous risks of PIV to men were somewhat (or largely) causative of their inability to enjoy it, or to enjoy it fully?
would you still do it? if so, why, and under what circumstances? if not, why not?
and finally…what if mens social status was that of, literally, dirt. of filth. what if mens corpus, mens bodies, were regarded as disgusting, and filthy too (even though, ironically, you were the one likely to infect *him* with something, and not the other way around). what if the language women used regarding having PIV with men was synonymous with harming them, and socially men and boys were the thing everyone else wiped their feet on? what if it had always been this way, and was this way currently, around the world?
if this were the state of things…what would PIV “mean” to you? what would you imagine that it “meant” to men? in other words…why do it at all, and is it at all possible that mens and womens “reasons” would differ?
i am just asking. stay tuned for part 3.
(part 3 is here).