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Oscillating Mascara: Worst Idea Ever? August 28, 2009

Posted by FCM in gender roles, health, pop culture, WTF?.
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as if coming at your own eyeball with a sharp-bristled brushfull of regular mascara wasn’t bad enough, the sadists of the cosmetic industry have brought us “oscillating mascara“!

finally! its a sharp-bristled brushfull of black goo that vibrates! for a true adventure, try applying this amazing wonder while on a bumpy city bus, or in the car. women actually do this, and have been doing it for years, even before the battery-operated vibrator was added to the handle.

now come on.  is this really and truly necessary?  lets pretend that animals werent used for testing this 600,000th offering of a mascara product, and that its not problematic at all to add even more batteries to our landfills.  in the interest of time, lets just examine the sheer odiousness of marketing an *actively dangerous* product as a beauty enhancer.  this isnt your mother’s mascara.

we arent talking about just red, irritated or allergic reactions to the mascara itself, to which i think we have all become rather desensitized, and have added it to our routines anyway, or not.  i am talking about corneal scratches.  serious infections.  and…blindness.  if we arent yet past the idea that women need suffer for fashion, cant we at least get past the unbelievably misogynist notion that women are eager and willing to place themselves in dangerous situations, in order to have sex with men?  isnt that what needs discussing here? 

i googled this atrocity and apparently the risk of injury with the vibrating brush isnt that much higher than with the regular brush….keeping in mind of course that the number one cosmetic-related injury is poking yourself in the eye with a mascara wand.

and this one gives you a few hundred extra “strokes per poke.”  ouch.