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And Now For Something Completely Different July 30, 2010

Posted by FCM in entertainment, feminisms, liberal dickwads, pop culture, thats random, video intermission.
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still feeling thinky?  heres the antidote: youtube!  this first video just made me laff and laff.  it really did.  i originally posted it here, so i guess its not *completely* different…that was before i became TRANSPHOBIC! and only like 5 people even read my humble little blog, and twitter and reddit had never even heard of me.  HA!  anyway, this is probably the most idiotic, legitimately dangerous, and un-fun idea for a toy i think i have ever seen in my life.  i found it absolutely hilarious.

this is a little gem i like to call “spot the born-women.”  just kidding!  this is comedian liam kyle sullivan performing one of his skits.  i dont know why, really, but i love this video.  or at least i did, before i became all rad and stuff.  i wonder if i would still like it now?  one way to find out…yep.  i still do.  i think i would tag it “liberal dickwads” though, if it were on my blog.  which it is, i guess.  i mean really.  i dont think i will ever appreciate these things the way i used to, now that men dont impress me with their cleverness.   oh well!  its a small price to pay i guess.  so i dont appreciate.  sue me.

this is a political remix video, setting the trailer to “pretty woman” to a horror soundtrack.  makes sense to me, obviously.  the only question i have is…where does the mythical creature exist, who is both old enough to remember “pretty woman” and young and tech-savvy enough to be a vidder?  “go her” is all i can say about this intrepid un-fun feminist, who created this as a part of a senior thesis.  whatever the hell that means.  i guess she can forget about getting that gender studies Ph.D. though, because she doesnt seem to get fun-feminism i mean gender issues, at all.  its supposed to be, like, funner.  whereas this just makes me hate men critical of aggregate male behavior.

and this one caught my eye because it allegedly features a “goat yelling like a man.”  i always thought men bleated like goats, but perhaps its the other way around?  i dont know, and i dont know that much about goats.  you will have to tell me, actually, because the speakers arent working on my laptop, and i cant hear it.  does this goat sound like a man, or not?  i have to say, i am fairly curious.

Comments

1. sonia - July 30, 2010

I give a f*, “text message breakup” is off the chains!! Storm troopers, Derby Dolls and Margaret Cho? That was funny as hell🙂

factcheckme - July 30, 2010

whats “a f*”?

one edit: whereas this just makes me hate men critical of aggregate male behavior.

lets call it what it is.

glad you liked the video sonia. i think its hilarious.

2. Level Best - July 30, 2010

Somewhere there is a Swing Wing class-action lawsuit brewing. . .God, this toy commercial obviously was made around the time I was a kid. Some prescient toy maker was trying to wipe out my generation of Boomer kids via vertebral injuries, quite obviously. I would have survived, b/c I was totally lazy as a little girl, and all that neck-swooping looks like hard work.

Text Message Breakup was one of the funniest videos I’ve ever seen! Kudos to this guy, whether or not he’s a liberal dee-wad, because this was great stuff.

And yes, that goat sure enough sounded exactly like a young man yelling. It’s a little scary, but then goats always sound a little human. When they say, “Baaah!,” it sounds like a person saying “Baaah!”

factcheckme - July 30, 2010

Could you “spot the born-women” level best? Lol. Thanks for playing! And the swing wing definitely appears to have gone the way of the lawn dart. Wtf are people thinking, when they come up with this shit?

3. SheilaG - July 30, 2010

Text message break up– hysterical! Goat does sound like men around here. Horror music for “Pretty Woman” pure genius.
Swing wing– didn’t bother me all that much. Hey we used to jump from garage roof to garage roof playing Superman when we were kids– surprised we all lived to tell the tale.

Great collection, great Friday fun! You’re not the best FCM you’re the bestest!

4. sonia - July 31, 2010

a f* is a fuck. I’m saying, sometimes you have to relax your standards to be able to laugh. I listen to comedians who are not feminist in any sense, but if I limited my life to my ideals, I’d be sitting in a corner of my room sobbing nonstop. Seriously. It’s not a radfem world!

factcheckme - July 31, 2010

Yes, i relax my standards every day, in almost every fucking way. That’s an understatement for what that is, actually. Beyond the obvious though, the liberal dickwadish things that stand out for me on a regular basis are the trite and petty. Even when they get everything else right, like the comedy in text message breakup is really good, it really is. But in the beginning, behind the actors on the walls, when they are having dinner, are pictures of Mel Gibson and Dick cheney. And that just struck me as irritating. They have a platform, and people are listening to what they have to say here. And they take the opportunity to say “Mel gibsons an asshole! Dick cheneys an asshole!” Which is of course true. But its also trite and petty.

It’s a small quibble, really. And i still love the video, and i liked it enough to share it. But things like that just constantly remind me what a petty universe men inhabit. Taking cheap political shots at each other, when its not even relevant is like…boring. really not clever, at all. That’s all. It’s just kind of heartbreaking that even the smart and funny ones who make terrific fun of asshole men…aren’t much more than asshole men, themselves. But what else is new right? No big deal. Except, it is.

5. sonia - July 31, 2010

Totally agree- right, he’s a douche so he has to have photos of Mel and Cheney. So fed up w the belief esp on the part of feminists that liberalism is at all better than right wing b.s… I mean, yes I want the choice to abort a pregnancy and fuck off with your religious bullshit, but there’s no real recognition of women in the left and it’s a distraction for women who have genuine fire. ah well.

That WAS funny as hell tho. love me some Margaret Cho too.

6. SheilaG - July 31, 2010

There is no difference in liberal vs. conservative men. The main thing we have to connect with is women– both liberal and conservative.

To me, the fun feminism thing seemed conservative and dreadful, literally giving your body to a bunch of men. It horrified the living daylights out of me.

Remember, second wave feminism came about because radical and liberal women got fed up with leftist men, and walked OUT of the new left male dominated labrea tar pit. It was about women discovering our own agenda.

Yes, things can be seemingly funny… the text message break-up number was largely funny to me because it highlighted a new technology and women getting revenge (a favorite theme with me).

Male comics can have a funniness, but they are ultimately not funny at all. I tend to laugh at the real life idiocy of men, and love to make fun of them. Mary Daly was one of my favorite make fun of men feminists.

There is plenty in feminism that is hysterical, and loads of lesbian writers who are comic as well. Read “The Professor and Other Stories” just out by Terry Castle, and her take on lesbian life is truly hysterical as well as clueless.

factcheckme - August 1, 2010

heres another one that i really like. i am sure they are liberal dickwads too, but at least they arent using gym equipment in a way that will make them an even bigger threat to women than they already are. ie. working out. and its funny!

7. sonia - August 2, 2010

!! That was good too. Yeah, liberal AND hipsters, but it has no bearing on their treadmill dexterity🙂 I like when they skate across them.

8. sonia - August 2, 2010

p.s. @Sheila- I think my favorite pt about Text message Breakup is just chicks leaned over screaming at the camera! LOL. That was my favorite part about riot grrrl-ism, too. The screaming. Screaming at dudes is so much fun.

9. berryblade - August 2, 2010

I wish I had a goat😦

10. Level Best - August 2, 2010

berryblade, I’m an Appalachian who grew up in the country with all kinds of domestic animals (and gardens! Yum! Do I ever miss gardens!). If you’re ever in the position where you can have goats, I can tell you that at least some nanny goats are placid and sweet. When I was a kid, my neighbors with goats even let me milk them, because their nanny goats were “child safe.” Billy goats on the other hand, will not only charge you with their horns (and even their hornless heads are ROCK hard, ouch!), but also will rear up and slash at you with their front hooves. “This PSA has been brought to you by your radfem agricultural extension agent, Level Best.”

factcheckme - August 2, 2010

There such awesome information here. Thanks gals! As for jumping from rooftop to rooftop Sheila, that sounds like fun, and actually it always amazes me that there aren’t more serious injuries with the shit kids do. We played on rooftops too, although we never had any lawn darts. Not sure why, as those were the schnizz back in the day! In case anyone doesnt know, lawn darts are illegal now. Because its all fun and games, as the saying goes, until someone takes a 6-inch, pound and a half, aerodynamic flying metal spear deliberately thrown in your direction by a tired, sunburned 8-year old, through the heart. Ouch!

11. berryblade - August 3, 2010

@Level Best

Aww, that’s the best thing I’ve heard all day🙂

factcheckme - August 3, 2010

Hey bb, i just commented over at your place. That is such a teriffic post.

12. SheilaG - August 3, 2010

berryblade— just read your ‘feminism y/n” piece and it was right on brilliant! I don’t get how people can be deluded as to thinking they are really making their own choices, when we have THE MOST psychologically sophisticated advertising industry in our faces all the time.

High heels… huge come back. No accident. No accidents folks.

There is very little freedom of choice because a mass market brainwashes people. It might be too painful to admit this, and I often think on reason I’m so out of this is that the mass market doesn’t “target” lesbians very effectively, so I get a free pass. It’s why I’m so at odds with straight women’s fashion sensibilities… the ads don’t get at me, the pressure doesn’t get at me, I’m not struggling to keep my husband….

13. SheilaG - August 3, 2010

P.S. Oopss sorry, off topic, berryblade just inspired me to rant…

14. SheilaG - August 3, 2010

I think kids were far more carefree when I was a kid. We just didn’t have all these dangerous toys at all. I don’t recall any toy injuries at all in the neighborhood, outside of falling off bikes that sort of thing.

Now all the safety things kind of overwhelm me just looking at them all– child care seats, helmets for bike riders…

15. berryblade - August 4, 2010

@SheilaG

Thanks so much🙂 “when we have THE MOST psychologically sophisticated advertising industry in our faces all the time.”

I know right, far out. I watched this documentary on advertising the other day in uni and the cold, calculating manipulation involved is fucking sickening.

Back on topic: Went to a friends farm the other day as well and got to pat a goat. WIN

factcheckme - August 4, 2010

relatedly, porn-lovers always say that watching porn doesnt influence them, violent movies/video games dont alter their moods or behaviors etc. if thats the case, then why do we have a multi-billion dollar advertising industry, that knows exacly the opposite about us, and makes billions of dollars off us annually by creating desire? literally creating it! and driving our behavior. ffs. people are so stupid.

16. Mandy - August 5, 2010

De-lurking to let you know that you’ve got a 27 year-old* hardline radfem who is madly in love with everything you write. MADLY. Although, I should probably inform you that I must be some kinda wacko, ’cause I just never got around to having (consensual) PIV! A fact that, as I am certain that we are all aware, makes me GUILTY of being: a virgin/a manhater/a closet lesbo/afraid of sex/afraid of intimacy/prudish/scarred/scared/a denier of my true, sacred, hard-wired, empowerfulizationized only when humiliated, evolutionarily dictated, naturally masochistic, INHERENTLY feminine self! So what the fuck would I know about anything? I don’t even wear heels, for christ’s sake!

(In other words, keep on calling it like it fucking is.)

*Do I still count as a young ‘un?

17. SheilaG - August 5, 2010

I don’t know where people get this idea that porn doesn’t influence them. More and more we’re hearing about porn addiction and what it does to people, how it ruins marriages. Porn has been used as a manual in the rape of women in war time… this first came out in the Bosnia civil war, and continues in places like Sudan.

Men increasingly dehumanize women when porn is readily available.
There is enough evidence of the dehumanizing woman hating aspect of porn, that it should put women on notice. Porn viewing should be an automatic deal breaker for any hetero woman on a first date with a man.

18. berryblade - August 5, 2010

“There is enough evidence of the dehumanizing woman hating aspect of porn, that it should put women on notice.”

Sadly, I don’t think most womyn realise how really dehumanising and horrible modern pornography is.

factcheckme - August 5, 2010

yay! a de-lurker! although i dont think i should be the one who decides who is a young ‘un, and who has crossed that line. 27 still seems young to me, you know, but from my perspective, “young people” still have every option available to them. and 27 is getting up there! young people could choose this, they could choose that. as many options or as much “potential” that a particular person will ever have, depending on their situation, is at its height when they are very young. its only recently that i have realized that when you choose a certain path, doors are closing behind you, all the way. i chose to finish school and start a career, and was fortunate enough to be able to complete that goal. and now i am at the end of my chilbearing years, and i have no children, not enough security to support any anyway, and for me, that was the right path. but i am starting to realize that no, in fact, you CANNOT have it all. you cannot be both a professional this and a professional that. you have to choose one, and even if you get the education in both, there arent enough years in your life to have a full career practising each one. you have to choose. you might never get to visit every continent. you will probably never be rich or famous, or even noteworthy, at all. you will probably just get by, if you are lucky, and again with a lot of luck, you will live a long time. you will probably have some health problems at some point; most people do. you will have to constantly adapt, and things change, always. you get more comfortable in your own skin though, even as your options in life are getting narrower and narrower. its weird. maybe at some point, i will have enough time and resources to do more fun stuff…but you know, thats an extremely privileged position, that i might never be in, and its completely dependant on good health, among other things. thats another thing i took for granted when i was very young: that i would always have the health and unlimited stamina to do anything i set my mind to. LOL well let me tell you, i am glad i finished school when i did, because all nighters and pizza dont work for me anymore. AT ALL.

anyway…you may not be a young ‘un, de-lurker, if this sounds like you. there are some TEENAGERS here, which amazes me. and they are literate, and tuned in, and they have as many options now as they ever will. this gives me hope.

factcheckme - August 5, 2010

although “wacko” 27-year old virgins (haha) and “mature” readers are kinda my bread and butter, at least in the comments section. love them! i cant even imagine what the PIV-ers are thinking, when they read this stuff. i like to think that at least its clear enough so that it makes sense, even to them. all i can do is put the words together in a way that communicates information, rather than obscures it. its the PIV-ers world, really. we all just live in it.

factcheckme - August 5, 2010

Also, I don’t really mean “choose” as much as I guess…commit? I don’t know. You can’t be in more than one place at once, and there are only so many hours in the day. That’s my point really. At some point, you realize your days are numbered, and your stamina isn’t what it once was anyway. It declines over time. That’s where I am right now. It’s not a bad place to be really, and in fact it was always the case. I just didnt know it, being all young and stuff.

19. Level Best - August 5, 2010

“But i am starting to realize that no, in fact, you CANNOT have it all.”–fcm

See, this is why I love reading you; you tell the stone, cold truth. No one wants to hear this, but it’s better to read it and file it away mentally than to feel like a failure for decades b/c you can’t do the impossible. Which has been sold by the MSM as the expected norm, for cat’s sake.

“you get more comfortable in your own skin though, even as your options in life are getting narrower and narrower.”–fcm

I have certainly gotten happier and happier with myself, and much more self-reliant and quietly defiant of “norms,” as I’ve aged. I’m about to enter my later 50’s, and I have been crazy happy since I became post-menopausal at 52. No more hormone flux, no chance that even a rapist can get me pregnant. And while my stamina certainly isn’t what it once was, I am much more self-protective with my commitments and time and I have plenty of strength and ability to do the things important to me.

Here’s a good book: Germaine Greer’s book, The Change. I read it as I was perimenopausal, and she helped me to see menopause as the good thing it is, ultimately, and to realize the happiness many older women have in their older years.

factcheckme - August 5, 2010

I actually think the “you can have it all” mantra is intended to lull women into a false sense of security, regarding their future ability to support themselves. “Have kids now, it doesnt close any doors!” Seems to be the message there, because its completely fucking obvious that doing other things til youre 40 closes one door: its extremely difficult to conceive after that. So when they say you can have it all, what they really mean is have kids now, and the rest will take care of itself. Which is a complete fucking lie. Noone is telling us “go to school til youre 40, and babies will fall out of the fucking sky effortlessly, after that.” The truth of the matter is that its all fucking dirty, gruelling work. And its going to be so, so hard (approaching impossible) to do it all.

20. Miska - August 5, 2010

The other thing that pisses me off about the “You can have it all!” bullshit is that over the last decade or so lots of articles have been written in the mainstream media about biological clocks, and the impossibility of being the perfect mother with a perfect career. All of them seem to take a kind of “tsk tsk, silly women for believing you could have it all” tone. And all of them seem to blame feminism for giving women the idea that we could have it all.

But feminism was never about women “having it all”. It’s always been about securing our basic fucking human rights. Feminism doesnt insist that women should have it all. It would be more accurate to say that feminism (lib feminism more precisely) insists that women should have equal access to the workforce, and that this should not prevent women from being a parent too. You know – just like how it works for men. Trust the media to twist something that would make women equal to men into women supposedly wanting to “have it all”. The phrase suggests that what women are asking for is completely unreasonable, instead of something that men already have and take for granted.

And it is possible for women to have equal access to the work force and to have children. But it would mean men would have to sacrifice some of their career and pick up some of the slack re child raising. Pfft. Like that is going to happen any time soon.

21. DarthVelma - August 5, 2010

I think the other problem with “you can have it all” is that the larger society has defined what “it all” means…and it’s too much for anyone. And woe betide anyone (especially a woman) who opts out of that definition and actually thinks for herself about what she wants.

For me it got a lot easier when I figured out what my own definition of “all” I wanted was.

It’s a lot easier to a) get all you want and b) deal with it when you don’t, if you defined it for yourself. And it’s certainly easier to have no regrets about the stuff you don’t have once you realize you never really wanted it to begin with.

At least that’s how it is for me, YMMV.

factcheckme - August 5, 2010

Yes! Thank you for that. It certainly isn’t any feminist credo I’ve ever heard of, that women should labor thanklessly in both the public “and” the private spheres. Ffs. Although we all know about the “second shift” and how gruelling it is. For women of course. Not for men.

And yay! Miskas back! See the previous 2 posts for some trans-analysis. You know, if you’re in the mood. Heh.

22. Level Best - August 5, 2010

DarthVelma, that is smart, smart, smart! Self-definition for the win!

factcheckme - August 6, 2010

I think the other problem with “you can have it all” is that the larger society has defined what “it all” means…and it’s too much for anyone

yes, having a family and a career is even too much for men, UNLESS those men have a woman at home to make it work. thats what they never say. if the woman wants to work too, they need some help, and not many people can afford to hire the very necessary third adult to make this happen. i also love how the issue is framed: women who “want” to work. many women DONT want to work, but they have to work because they are WORKING CLASS. duh. many households need not just two but three or more incomes to survive. this is just more middle/upper middle class bullshit, packaged up like a lifestyle choice when in reality poor women have always worked, and they always will. of course, oftentimes poor families have social support, other family members, older children and other people around who can help out, and middle class women are often completely isolated in their roles, and have no help from anyone. but the whole thing is just absurd. NOONE DOES THIS ALONE. especially men. if women didnt always keep everything going, it would fall apart. and as i proposed in the “hypervigilance” post, they dont even realize or care that things ARENT falling apart, because as men, they would just think it was a fun adventure on some level if they were living on the fucking street. or maybe thier “reputation” would take a hit, but they would never be in any real danger. and men dont even hear their own children when they are crying! or they pretend not to. assholes! women know better.

23. SheilaG - August 6, 2010

“you can have it all”– I always thought that an odd thing, and it never ever felt like it came out of true feminism. It seemed more like an ad slogan. Anyone know who invented the term?

Men automatically get this if they are married. I recall some survey of surgeons at MASS General, and almost all the women in that profession were unmarried and had no kids, whereas about 95% of the males in that profession were married and did have kids. Hmmm.

Take a look at many top level women in Obama’s administration or even Bush II’s.

Equality is when women and men have the same options with no stigma or commentary one way or another.

To me, the whole thing seemed dubious. I watch the exhaustion and overwork of straight women all the time. It’s just not an appealing life to be raising kids and working full time. I used to get the “lesbian free pass”– no one bothered to ask me if I was having or wanted to have kids. Now, geez, even young lesbians ask me about this! My answer usually is, hey, you can’t afford kids, I can’t afford them. Why would you want such an economic burden if you had a real choice?
And for me, it truly is a choice. For hetero women under the PIV decree, well it’s another matter.

Very interesting comments….just very good stuff here!!!


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