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The Neo-Vagina Monologues January 23, 2010

Posted by FCM in authors picks, entertainment, feminisms, health, kids, PIV, rape, self-identified feminist men, thats mean, trans, WTF?.
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like women, vaginas dont have much of a voice in a patriarchal, misogynist culture.  thus, a woman playwright created “the vagina monologues.” 

the title was shocking, but even more so was the very notion that vaginas, like women, have experiences. of course, born-women know that.  but not surprisingly, noone ever asks about womens experiences, or those of our vaginas.  now that someone has mentioned it, my vagina is pretty pissed off too. all vaginas are, thats the whole point. 

vaginas are pissed off because they are treated like shit, like garbage. like toys. when in reality, vaginas are organs. organs, like hearts and lungs are organs. got that? good.  and organs, like, do stuff.  they are good for more than one thing.  working in conjunction with other organs and tissues, organs create organ-systems.  often, overlapping systems that, like, do stuff.  like this: 

now, a question.  what other organs do we deliberately treat like shit?  do we expose the heart and lungs to poisons, chemicals and irritants in order to improve them?  what other of our organs are considered defective and in need of intervention, when they are working properly in their natural state?  none. got that?  good. 

this is the state of the union when it comes to women and our vaginas.  our sex.  literally, our born-sex.  vaginas are organs, but women are the “other.”  medically, socially, and sexually, we are a defective knock-off of the real thing: men.  thats going to cause some problems for us. because its a shared problem, theres a shared history there.  a female-specific history, specifically related to our born-sex.  think i am an essentialist for pointing that out?  go fuck yourself.  then, consider this common example: our first periods.  menstruation is treated as if it were a disease, and women as if we are diseased, even though its a completely normal function of a healthy organ system.  and many of us remember the first time we menstruated just like we remember where we were on 9/11, or when kennedy was shot (or whatever):

our vaginas are also the preferred target of men’s abuse.  this necessitates men protecting us from other men, begging the question: protection from WHAT?  we dont need men to protect us, we need men to leave us alone.  but they never do, do they?  “the vagina monologues” includes the story of one woman who, as a child, was raped by her dad’s best friend.  her dad shot him, and she didnt see her dad again for 7 years because some other men sent him to fucking jail.  for shooting a rapist, while the rapist’s dick was still inside the mans minor daughter:

these are compelling stories, every one of them.  now i ask you, people.  what would a neo-vagina have to say, if a neo-vagina could talk?  this is a serious question.  to help you get into character, heres a prop: this is what a neo-vagina looks like: