Blogging at the end of the world.

they are actually trying to hypnotize us now.  and mom: your sugar-faced boy child is a monster.

in case anyone was wondering how my latest project is going, i can report the following: after seeking treatment and treating with medical cannabis for about the last 3 months, not only have i gotten much, much worse, but about 2.5 months into it i got both sick of being stoned all the time and tired of being a consumer.

to be clear, i now believe there is an anti-consumerist component to whatever the hell this thing is — i am sick and tired of being penetrated and pronged by men and maleness all the damn time including mens pollution and poison including frankenfoods, all mens consumer products including their drugs, and including their dope, and that includes their organic dope.  and specifically regarding their dope, it doesnt matter who grows it, or owns it, or dispenses it.  get it?  i now believe that everything on this planet is poison and it is all poison.  there is plenty of evidence that this is in fact true.

and as much as i had hoped otherwise, i dont think any aversion to being penetrated by mens filth and poison is anything “in my head” i can easily or even painfully get over — i think being penetrated for 40+ years by men and maleness (living as a female in patriarchy) has made me so sick that there is nothing that will save me now.  putting stuff in, at this point, can only be counted on to make things worse.

as far as pain relief, however, i can report that there is relief to be had in medical cannabis if you can stomach it; there is absolutely no debating that there is palliative care here for women, if they are able to access it.  understanding a few things about medical cannabis helps us understand what is there for us, and also pokes at why its been kept from women, specifically, for as long as it has, and why even current regulations on it look the way they do.  for example, higher body fat means you need more.  get it?  just speaking in generalities, this means that women will need more than men will to treat those diseases we share with men.  were the current regulations including therapeutic dosage and legal possession thresholds constructed with this in mind?  probably, considering that there is no differentiation between male and female patients for any reason including legal reasons.  it was all made for men.

nausea, of course, is the other rather glaring sex-based difference in patients seeking palliative care with medical cannabis.  how frequently would any male, as a member of the male sex class, be reasonably expected to suffer from nausea in their lifetime (and how many men are likely to never experience it?)  compare and contrast where some 70% of the worlds women are impregnated and give birth.  more than that are impregnated but do not carry to term.  every single one of them (us) is at risk for nausea including severe, debilitating nausea.  and cannabis is known to cure it without side effects to either the woman or the baby.  what an excellent reason to make it illegal for decades, and what an excellent reason to impose pro-male policies on even legalized medical cannabis today.  because women are suffering because of men and what men do to us.  because.  there may be actual causation there.  we need to consider this.  i am sure some of you already have.

but what i really wanted to say was this.  i am 1000 miles away from anyone and everyone i know, treating my chronic pain with medical cannabis.  and i really, really feel like i am doing the right thing, and its not just because i am sick and unlikely to be well again.  there are no bees anymore.  there are no butterflies anymore either.  im in big sky country now and i look at the stars through the branches of a dead tree.  there is a stump in the grass 10 feet away from it where another tree had obviously lived and died too.  it feels like the whole world is dying now.  deadening my pain here at the end of all things feels like the right thing to do, and it seems literally insane to me that not everyone is doing this.  of course i know not everyone can.

by the by, china is big enough in both land and people to take out the entire world, or to make the whole thing in their own image, or something, and “they” have created an ecological apocalypse for all of us to share.  i am assuming you all read this.  the beginning is the descriptive part, where 30 years of chinese (male) policy and practice of resource extraction and construction projects has literally and utterly destroyed china.  because of the pollution and loss of habitat from these necrophilic projects, chinese people are sick, really sick.  they are suffering and dying.  the last part is just nonsensical pro-patriarchal jibberish and fingerpointing as the western progressives and radicals try to pretend that it was capitalism and communism that did in china and us all, and not men, in the case of china including corrupt chinese males and western investors who also happen to sport/support dick (and necrophilia).

also, extreme weather sunk a chinese cruise ship.  this is after 2 full size commercial jets have gone missing in a similar part of the world, one of them after diverting to avoid extreme weather.

thing is, there is no “us” and “them” anymore.  savvy?  if people are not starting to understand that, then i seriously wonder whether they have thought any of this through.  query: what would widespread illness and palliative care happening against a backdrop of “business as usual” look like?  consider that you dont know how the person in the next car is feeling, or where they are going, or where they have been.  they might be feeling sick, or are medicating so they dont feel anything.  as time goes on, i would pretty much count on it.

these are just my observations of course, and i am but one person.  🙂  🙂  so hows things going where you are?  how are you feeling?  how are things looking?  im just asking.

PS.  if NTE were real, and the US supreme court justices (as members of the powers that be) knew it, what would they probably do wrt gay marriage and obamacare?  palliative care for all?  or stick in the knife further and twist it more?  methinks they want us all on dope, in one manner or another.  methinks they are smart, and calculating, to do what they did, ridiculous inflammatory dissents included.  enjoy your gay weddings and subsidized big pharma and unsubsidized medical cannabis yall.  i suppose youve earned it (some of you by aligning yourselves with the dangerous males SCOTUS itself has likely come to fear).

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